Film review: Yes Man

Yes Man @ IMDB

First things first, this film is based on a book by a guy called Danny Wallace who I don't really like. Not for any particular reason but here we go:

He co-wrote a book called Are You Dave Gorman? with the eponymous Dave Gorman. Now Gorman went on to create the genius Googlewhack Adventure whilst Danny Wallace didn't. He took the Gorman template (man going on crazy adventure/challenge) and ran with it a little too far. In an ideal world, the talented Gorman would go on to glory whilst the, let's be honest, copycat Wallace wouldn't.

Of course, this isn't an ideal world so whilst Gorman still ploughs his own path Wallace gets a movie deal. Go figure.

So really I wasn't looking forward to this film a great deal. Based on the book, we have Jim Carrey as a man (not Danny Wallace, thankfully) who decides to change his life and say yes to everything.

Now Jim Carrey is a tricky actor to pin down. With him you'll get one of three faces; Mr Wacky from Ace Ventura, Mr Smaltz from Liar Liar or Mr Actor from The Trueman Show and Eternal Sunshine. Ideally, he'd be the last one all the time as those are his best films, closely followed by Mr Wacky.

This film aims to combine all three. It's not 100% successful but it's not bad. Mr Actor is forced to the background a bit but this means Mr Wacky is reigned in so he's not annoying. Mr Smaltz rears his ugly head at the end but he's not there very long and it is a romantic comedy so you can forgive it.

The main thing is, this is a funny film. It hits the mark more often than not, there's great support around Charrey (the cameo by the manager of The Flight of the Conchords is a particular highlight) and it's nicely paced.

It's not the best comedy this year but it's certainly up there at the top of the list.

In a word? Positive.

Alright, THIS is the film I'm most looking forward to

The Expendables.

Let's break it down: Starring Stallone, Jason Statham, Jet Li AND Dolph Lundgren. Not forgeting this is being directed by Stallone and we all know how his last action film turned out.

It's this or Inglorious Basterds. But then The Expendables is described as "an 80s throwback men on a mission movie in the vein of Commando and Predator".

Commando and Predator?

Sold.

Solid Gold Genius

40 Inspirational Speeches in 2 Minutes.

Let's go do something!

New favourite music video

Better than Neon Neon.

Film review: The Day The Earth Stood Still

The Day The Earth Stood Still @ IMDB

You have to feel sorry for Keanu Reeves. I'm sure if you total up the box office totals for his films he'd be enormously successful. Bill & Ted, Speed, The Matrix, these are big big films. And he gets no respect.

One might say he was the new Steve Guttenberg.

But at least Guttenberg knew his place, he pretend he was anything else other than a B-Grade actor who got lucky with some of the roles he was cast in. He didn't star in remakes of 50s Sci-Fi films and pretend that they were anything else than throwaway tosh.

As you might guess, this is a remake of the 50s classic which tells the tale of an alien called Klaatu that comes to Earth in order to warn the human race about their destructive ways. Only, instead of being about the Cold War like in the original, this time it's about man causing the ecological destruction of Earth.

How topical.

On the plus side, it looks good. They have kept the design of Klaatu's robot bodyguard similar to the original so no issue there. The initial half an hour or so of the alien craft landing is great, that sequence should have it's own film*.

It just doesn't hang together after that. We get that Klaatu is meant to be this emotionless, distant character but he's too distant. There's nothing there to hook us in as the humans are pretty dumb as well.

What we have is the basis for a really good film but it's not this one. Must do better, all round.

In a word? Stationary.

* In fact there is one, it's called Close Encounters of The Third Kind. Look it up.

Film review: Madagascar - Escape 2 Africa

Madagascar - Escape 2 Africa @ IMDB

Now, DreamWorks Animation Studios has always come off worse when compared to Pixar. Most people come off worse, admittedly, but DreamWorks have always been like Simon Cowell compared to Pixar's Brian Eno: in it for the money rather than for the love of the medium.

So it continues with this sequel to Madagascar; our animal friends from the first film leave the island only to crash land in Africa. What kind of hi-jinks will ensue? I think we already know.

I don't have a problem per-se with the the first film, it just wasn't that good. It was fun and everything but never more than that.

Do we need that fun a second time? Probably not but we'll get it anyway because the kids like it and makes the studio a lot of money.

Everyone from the first film is back but now we get some backstory crowbarred onto them that makes no sense: if he arrived in New York in a crate wouldn't he of mentioned this in the first film? When did the monkeys arrive on the island? Two of the characters are in love? Really?

To be honest, most kid films collapse when you think about them too hard* but the whole thing just comes off as lazy. The point is: there is no need for this film to exist. The reason Toy Story 2 works so well is because there was a new story to tell with the characters. There is no story in this film that wasn't already told in the first film, it's just a collection of set pieces hamfistedly strung together in order to get the kids in.

Which works, because my son loves it.

In a word? Roar-ful.

* Except for Toy Story, Toy Story 2, Wall-E etc.

What's better than zombies?

Nazi zombies!

Slightly Depressing YouTube Video of The Day

Film review: Zack and Miri Make a Porno

Zack & Miri @ IMDB

It's fair to say, despite the mauling he generally receives, Kevin Smith is an icon for a certain section of popular culture fanboys. Having made his fame maxing out his credit cards to make a film, he's become almost the inspiration for the geek chic culture.

One group of people he has influenced is the Judd Apatow stable of movies, who follow the Smith Template of lewdness and sentimentality.

Now this comes full circle with Zak & Miri Make a Porno which stars Seth Rogen, one of the ring leaders of the Apatow films. A slice of fried comedy gold?

Hmm.

The story is interesting: we have two best friends who are struggling financially, who decide that the best way to escape their woes would be to make a porn film. Naturally. But the issue of sex won't complicate the relationship. Will it?

So you can see where it's going to go but with Kevin Smith films the ride is generally more important. As you do get his usual snappy dialogue, some nice jokes and the sight of Jason Mewes' cock.

But why am I not that enthused?

In a weird way Seth Rogen is the problem. This is because the films he's made are (basically) Kevin Smith films but done better. They don't have the self indulgence that has been infecting Smith's films since Jersey Girl. They don't rely on a ridiculous level of sentimentality. And they don't chuck in stupid dance bits that should have been left in rubbish 1980s John Hughes films.

The reason why Kevin Smith films used to stand out is because no one was making films like he made them. But now people are the cracks are starting to show. What he needs to do now is a completely fresh break and work on something new. At least the original View Askewniverse movies had a surreal charm to them, but the films he's made outside of that just seem like re-treads but without the good bits.

Possibly a little harsh there. It's still a good film but there's so much potential going to waste.

In a word? Shame.

Boo!

Seriously? Is he the best we can do?

Rubbish!

Film Review: Quantum of Solace

Quantum of Solace @ IMDB

Bond is back. Again.

So it'ss fair to say that the anticipation for the second Daniel Craig Bond film has been intense, to say the least. And I'll include myself in that as Casino Royale was a great film that came out of nowhere.

And this is the problem, but we'll get to that shortly.

Hot on the heels of the end of Casino Royale, Bond is on a mission to find the people behind the actions of his last Bond Girl, the traitorous Vesper.

Now, I've stopped the plot description there before it gets too confusing because the plot is a tad confusing. The Bourne Influence casts a mighty shadow over this film, including the labyrinthine plot that doesn't make that much sense. The reason why this worked in Bourne is that Bourne himself was on a straight line, trying to find the people out to get him. It was around him that all the double crossing CIA stuff happened so it didn't overwhelm the plot. Meanwhile in Bond, he's right in the middle of plot which puts the not very clear story right at the front of the film. Not ideal.

The bad guy isn't that good either, he's hardly a threatening presence in the film and not the big enemy that Bond needs.

The real problem is that this isn't the film we were expecting. We all wanted Casino Royale 2 but this isn't it. Whilst the action sequences are great it just doesn't connect the way Royale did. This is possibly down the humanising aspects of Bond that are missing from this film. I know he's supposed to be a grief stricken revenge obsessed super spy but he's so emotionally distant from us in this film that it detracts from the whole experience.

That isn't to say that Craig isn't a good Bond because he really really is. The few real Bond moments in the film he makes his own, he just needed a better script to support him.

It is a great action film (as you would expect as the Second Unit Director who did the action sequences worked on the Bourne films) but Casino Royale was a great action film with a great story.

This only gets it half right.

In a word? Bland.

Film Review: Star Wars - The Clone Wars

Star Wars: The Clone Wars @ IMDB

Hmm.

Previous reviews have noted that I am very much a child of the 80s. Nothing wrong with this. But this also means, of course, that Star Wars is a major landmark in my life.

It's hard to grasp just how all consuming it was, how it enraptured me and my generation. What isn't hard to grasp is how it's recently had the life strangled out of it by ill-conceived projects and films.

We won't go into the Prequel Trilogy here* as it's a conversation for another time, we will just focus on this new Star Wars film which is new in a couple of ways: it's all in 3D CGI and it fills in some gaps between Episodes 2 and 3 of the main Star Wars films.

What we have here is Obi Wan and Anakin and a shed load of clone troopers trying to rescue the son of Jabba the Hut.

Hmm.

Kids version of Stars Wars is nothing new. There were the Ewoks and Droids cartoons of the 80s, the Caravan of Courage film and the cartoon series this film was based on. That isn't to say that this is necessarily a good thing.

Visually, haven't got a problem. The art style of the cartoon series is based on the Genedy Tartakovsky looks of the series (see Dexter's Lab and Samurai Jack) which is heavily anime based. Whilst some may not like it (I've heard Obi Wan's beard described as lumps of wood stuck onto his face) it's not awful by any means. The battle sequences look great.

One weird aspect of this is the Droid army. These were always CGI in the Prequel films and they look exactly the same here. It's a strange bridge between the live action and animated films.

The problem is when they open their mouths. This film is good evidence as to why getting experienced actors for 3D CGI films is a good thing. The only actors from the film series to reprise their roles are Samuel L Jackson and Christopher Lee. And Yoda, but I'm not sure if he counts.

To put it simply: they're rubbish. Obi Wan's accent is all over the place and the only thing more annoying than Anakin's whiny voice is his annoying Jedi sidekick. All of them, rubbish.

It just feels like a cheap TV show that got some money thrown at it so it could come out in the cinema. The story drags itself along, the characters fall flat and it has no ambition whatsoever.

The worst thing is that it'll make money on name alone and get shown again and again. But the real worst thing is that this is what my son is going to think Star Wars is.

No thank you.

In a word? Hmm.

* Han Solo fired first!

Now that's the stuff

Looking better than I'd have thought possible.

The Best Video Game Music Man Ever

Ladies and gentlemen, The Doyouinverts:

Awesome!

Hiro's Dad is in the next series of I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here!

Wait. That isn't a good thing.

Nevermind. At least it'll stop the Shatner/Takei blood feud for a while.

Probably in bad taste

But it's best to be on the safe side, isn't it?

Film review: Kung Fu Panda

Kung Fu Panda @ IMDB

Sometimes ideas just sound great. As soon as you say them, you can't help but just say "yep, that works". It's like Kit Kat Chunkys with Cookie Dough, it just works.

So in this film we have a Panda doing Kung Fu. Simple, to the point, great idea.

It's a wonder there hasn't been that many kid versions of kung fu films considering the popularity of things like Power Rangers. After all, kung fu films are essentially plot light with a simple story that moves from A to B with minimum fuss and maximum action.

The plot for this film can easily be summed up in that it's about Po, a lowly panda working in his father's Noodle Restaurant who dreams of becoming a kung fu master with his idols The Furious Five. But then the deadly Tai Lung escapes and only the Dragon Warrior can stop him.

Guess who's picked to become the Dragon Warrior?

The film goes exactly as you'd expect but this isn't a problem because it's so much fun. Jack Black as Po is always good value for money, even when it's just his voice. We get all the usual Kung Fu cliches but they're wrapped up in such a great looking package it becomes a great homage rather than a lazy parody.

And it does look great. The kung fu action is seamless and fluid with a superb weight to it. Good bad guy, great set pieces and nicely paced. Whilst it's not a great piece of cinema like Wall-E, it's the second best kids film I've seen this year.

Frankly, the film is worth the entrance price for the opening Samurai Jack-inspired sequence.

In a word? Hiyah!

Whatever

43%

Boo!

No one has died but the game I'm most looking forward to has been delayed, only by a week or so but it's enough goddamnit.

I managed to get into the Beta which was very fun. It looks on the surface to be a pretty straight forward 2D platformer. Which is pretty much is. But the imagination and the craft in the game is immense and really draws you in.

The main character, Sackboy, should conquer the world. When you controlling him, if you press Up on the D-pad he'll smile, press it again and he'll smile more. Press it a third time and he does a huge goofy grin and his tongue flops out. I only mention this becuase it made my 4 year old son laugh hysterically when he saw it. Now he loves Sackboy.

Thank God you can get these in time for Christmas.

I got into the Beta quite late so I didn't get too deep in the level creator. This is absurdly powerful, enabling you to create pretty much anything in the game. One particular user created level I played was a Ninja Warrior level. I love Ninja Warrior.

But this doesn't matter as the Beta has finished and the game has been delayed so I can't play it anymore which makes me sad.

Boo!

It's all going off!

Normally around this time of the year it's football players being sacked, now it seems to be celebrities divorcing.

Place your bets on who is going to be next. I reckon it's going to be Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston next.

What?