Film Review: Premonition

Premonition @ IMDB

Let's get one thing clear: my darling wife loves Sandra Bullock. She has a Sandra Bullock DVD collection. I can't tell you in mere words how much she likes Two Weeks Notice. So when she saw the trailer for a new Sandra Bullock film she, well, she freaked.

Now, keep that in mind. My wife loves Sandra Bullock. Not in mind that way. It needs to be kept in mind because when we left the cinema after watching this film my wife's first words were:

"That was a bag of shite."

Two things came to my mind when she said that:

1) Thank God I didn't have to be polite about the film and pretend I liked it and

2) How bad must a Sandra Bullock film be for a self confessed Sandra Bullock freak to declare it as "a waste of £5 and 2 hours of my life"?

I won't bore you with the plot details but will just highlight a few things. First of all, Sandra aims for a kind of brooding screen presence and misses by a country mile, ending up in Constapation Town. The music screams "FOREBODING! THIS IS FOREBODING! PREPARE YOURSELF! THIS IS FOREBODING!" from the start and never. Ever. Stops. Julian McMahon's eyebrows are way too straight and black. There is a ridiculous scene with a priest towards the end that looks like it's going to give a reason for the time travel shenanigans but then backs away with a "meh, weird stuff happens". As far as I was aware, the rules clearly state that if you're going to do time travel you either give it a full and frank explanation, preferably with somekind of machine (Back To The Future, The Time Machine) or not at all (Groundhog Day). The script also gets tangled up in these time travel escapades that make no sense and has a stupid twist at the end.

But the worst thing, the most annoying thing is that the film makers obviously have no faith in the audience. They think they are retards. I say this because half way through Sandra Bullock finally realises that, hey, she must be travelling in time nevermind that fact that the rest of us figured it out before the first reel ended. But when she figures it out she gets a sheet of A3 paper and writes down everything that has happened so far in GIANT RED MARKER PEN. And they chuck in some flashbacks as well, just in case people in the audience can't read.

Insulting. Rack this one next to The Lake House and forget about it.

This film doesn't even deserve an Umbrella. It gets a Wet Fish.